TCS NYC Marathon

Sunday, November 14th

It's been a week since I ran the TCS NYC Marathon for Smile-A-Mile, and I wanted to share about this amazing experience for all of those who supported me through prayers, donations, and encouragement.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The week(s) leading up to the marathon were extremely tough. Avery's first birthday in Heaven was approaching, and my pain and heartache were taken to a completely different level. This was the "first" that I dreaded more than any of them. It was the day that was supposed to be all about her, but she wasn't here to be a part of it. We celebrated her day with a rainbow cake and shiny unicorn balloons. It was quiet and understated which is just what Avery would have wanted.

I knew from the beginning that Avery's birthday would be tough. So in June/July, I decided I wanted to celebrate her in a different way this year. With Shon's encouragement, I signed to run the TCS NYC Marathon(which was just 3 days after her birthday) as a part of team Smile-A-Mile. I had 2 goals for this race from the very beginning: 1. Raise money for Smile-A-Mile and 2. Finish. I needed something... anything to help occupy my time and my mind during these extremely difficult first months. I was looking for an outlet for my pain and grief, and this seemed like exactly what I needed to begin healing.

Training for a marathon is hard. Training for a marathon in the Alabama heat and humidity when you have not been consistently running and are physically and emotionally exhausted is ever harder. But every time things seemed hard, I thought about who I was actually running for which pushed me forward. It didn't take long for me to realize that this race was never about me. It was always about them... it was for our Smile-A-Mile family. It was for all of the kids we have met along the way...the Fighters, the Survivors, and the Angels.

The morning of the race was crisp but beautiful. I was bundled up in throw away clothes with a bag of snacks to last me until my 11:20am start. I talked to lots of strangers and told them about Avery. Many of them shared similar stories about running the race for a friend or family member who they lost to various diseases. The 4 hour wait passed more quickly than I imagined, and then it was finally my turn to walk to the start line. As soon as the cannon(literally) went off all my nervousness faded away, and I just started running. The streets were lined with people and music! It was like a 26.2 mile party. I felt amazing through the 5k and 10k marks. I knew I was going a little faster than I should, but the excitement and the crowds made it hard not to. By the time I hit the half marathon mark, my legs and my watch(which finally caught up) told me that I wasn't running the race I trained for. So I had to level set, think about my goals, and force myself to slow down.

I wore bracelets in honor of some of our close friends who are still fighting and another angel whose family we love dearly. I prayed for each of those friends on the course, and I would like to ask you to pray for them too:

Caleb: I prayed for Caleb's tumor to shrink and for the vision he has lost to be restored. I prayed for the long journey of chemo he has ahead of him and for his Mom, Dad, and brother as they support him. I prayed for wisdom for his doctor's and nurses.

Ford: I prayed for protection from germs and illness over Ford as he continues treatment. He's had a rough time lately with fevers and ER visits. I prayed for strength and stamina as he continues Kindergarten. I prayed for his parents, 3 siblings, and grandparents who are so special to us.

Lana: I prayed for Lana to have relief from the pain and neuropathy that she's been battling for so long. I pray for her to feel strong, confident, and at peace now that she finished treatment. I pray for her to remain cancer free and to get to enjoy the normal life that a 19 year old should have.

Nolan: I prayed for sweet Nolan as he continues treatment for relapse. I pray for protection over his body(specifically his kidneys) as he endures these harsh chemos. I pray for him and his brother to get to experience as much fun and normalcy as possible. I prayed for him to get to return to in-person school when it is safe.

Angel: Angel passed away 5 years ago, and NYC was her favorite place. I prayed for her sweet Mama who works full time, runs Angel's Hope Foundation, and is getting her PHD all while being an amazing single Mom and friend. I prayed for her sweet little sister who has experienced so much loss at only 5 years old. She calls Ella & Lexi her best friends!

Smile-A-Mile: I prayed for this amazing organization and the amazing people who work there! I pray for all of the families who have been and will be touched by them.

I enjoyed every step of the second half of the race(except for the Ed Koch Queensboro bridge). I high fived the spectators. I hit the signs for power. I laughed. I smiled. I remembered. I wore a picture of Avery on my back along with the names of 28 kids we know that lost their lives to cancer. At mile 23, I took the picture off my back and ran with it in my hand. It was a visual reminder of why I was there, and it helped fuel me the last 3.2 miles. The closer I got to the finish line, the more emotional I got. Tears started welling up in my eyes just thinking about it. I just knew I was going to be a mess when I crossed that line. But then I was there... I threw my arms up and ran across the line smiling. There were no tears. There was no sadness. There was no pain.

I felt humbled to be given the opportunity. I was overwhelmed with gratitude. I was honored to be the vessel. This race was never about me. #brAvery